Todays I.T

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Upgrade boyfriend 5.0 to husband 1.0 - Pentium version

Dear IT Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed aslow down in the overall performance, particularly in the flower, gifts and jewellery applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programs such as Formula One 5.0, NBA 3.0, World Cup 2.0 and Falling Asleep 1.0. And now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate Housewife

Reply:

Dear Desperate Housewife,
First keep in mind: Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try entering the command C:\ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0 .If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run theapplications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Late Night TehTarik 6.1. Late Night 6.1 is a very bad program that will create SnoringLoudly.wav files. Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limitedmemory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider additional software to improve memory andperformance. I personally recommend HotTastyFood 3.0 and TongkatAli 6.9.

Good Luck,
IT Support